In a world where hardened hearts are common how do you become a warm hearted and trusting person after years of harm in many disguised forms? 
We live in a time where hurt gets hurt and love and trust are simply words that fall from a dissected language.    Humans are walking around full of anger, resentment, hostility and entitlement and wonder why life is not going their way.  We need to do better, all of us.   If you believe that you are doing enough, do more.  
Relationships of all kinds tear us apart and our parents are no exception.   As a child kids can be cruel and parents can be unforgiving.   Teachers can destroy self-esteem.   There is an endless list of different types of trauma that each individual encounters in their life time and there are ways in which we can allow ourself peace from these places.
As someone who never felt safe, loveable,   accepted, good enough, worthy and all the other words that depict feelings of misery and inadequacy I have had to relearn how to live.
I have had to learn how to radically accept myself.
I have had to learn how to radically accept others for who they are.
I have had to put down the martyrdom.
I have had to let go of people for showing me the truth of who they are.
I have had to take ownership of my own victimhood.
I have had to forgive those who have harmed and abused me.
I have had to treat my body better.
I have had to create better boundaries.
I have had to create my own business to feel more freedom in life.
I have had to talk to my parents about the truth.
I have had to read a lot of books.
I have had to use Reiki every day.
I have had to meditate every day.
I have had to open my heart again and again.
I have had to be unapologetic in my authenticity.
I have had to use my voice against others.
I have had voices used against me.
I have had to journal and write letters to so many people for emotional release.  (I do not send these letters, I burn them or send them in the mail with no addresses so they get lost in the ethers).
I have had to get creative and consistent in my healing.
I have had to be celibate. 
I have had to remain single.
I have had to...
and the list goes on, the work is here and it is constant but I am not exhausted for I am filling my life with things I enjoy and no longer enslaved to the ideas of society or of family interest.   I am free to live my life as me and for me and with the knowledge that THAT IS TOTALLY ACCEPTABLE.
What have you had to do to break down the walls your life has built up around you?
Where can you make more room to let love in?
In a world where we have been told and told again and again that we don't know better, I encourage you to fucking know better.  To remember that as an individual you have so much power and knowledge and that with each moment you have an opportunity to love again and again, even if that love is for yourself.
You are enough, you have always been enough and you always will be enough.
I love you
I see you
I cherish you
​The world needs your love.

We exist in a world where  the Feminine has been disgarded and tossed aside - the Feminine within each of us regardless of  gender  or sex.   In countries all over the world the ideas of sensuality, naked bodies and the truth of her meaning has been washed away from everyone's consciousness and  is causing harm to not only humans but to Mother Earth.  The power of the Divine Feminine comes not from her physical appearance but from her messages in relation to balance and harmony.  
The Divine Feminine is the  dance in the twilight  through the darkness of the unknown.  It is from the Feminine heart that we are gifted forgiveness and that those who have entered wars and slaughters are met with compassion and healing.  It is within each of us hiding in the darkest corners of our bodies and our minds and she is ready for her rebirth.  As we live on this Earth we can feel her pulse through the quakes and the erruptions, we can feel her fury roar into tsunamis.  It is within her that we witness an entirely different strength.  The strength to see the beauty in destruction, in surrending, in opening to receive and to hold the dark container for the masculine to rise with it.  
The Divine Feminine was something that naturally found its way to me once I began healing some of my deepest wounds including but definitely not limited to, the trauma in my pelvis from medical procedures and from abusive partnerships (emotional, physical and sexual in varying degrees).   It is tied to healing the rejection of my father and the belief that my value as a partner was tied to my abilities in the bedroom.    Finding the Divine Feminine has guided me through true healing of varying experiences and has opened me up to the most sacred relationship, the relationship to myself.   I no longer feel shame surrounding my needs and am able to hold space for so many other people to witness their own self rejections.   It is through this work with the Divine Feminine that you will reclaim your powerful sovereignty over your life and your body.  
These guides take 15-30 minutes each and are intended to be implemented one at a time, the time was important as I do not want you to make an excuse as to why you cannot take action.  If you do not have 15-30 minutes a day of time for yourself you need to re-prioritize.  My hope is that these written words inspire you to take these 7 steps in 7 days to activate, nourish and witness the beauty in your Feminine so without further ado,  here they are.

1.  Introductions: This practice allows your to witness yourself behind the mask, it will help unveil your inner self and introduce you to your inner Feminine.    

•  activity:  Stand or sit naked in front of a mirror where you can see your eyes and body.   Put a timer on your phone or watch the clock for 1 minute.  Begin glancing over your body, noticing every part, every bone, every roll, every wrinkle and witness the beauty in her.  Take note of if this feels like a long time, short time, if it is uncomfortable or safe, are you criticizing yourself? why? Speak only words of kindnes and don't forget to give love to the  part/s that you are so quick to judge.  Once your timer goes off, reset it for 1 minute and gaze into your own eyes through the reflection in the mirror.  Let your eyes soften and look into them.  If you find it difficult to focus on both try focusing on one eye instead.  Take note of how you feel, if you are able to smile, cry, if it is weird, or you wonder why you are even doing it.  Take 15 minutes to journal about your experience.

2.  Naked mirror practice and heart massage.  Breasts  on men and women are connected to the heart and it is important to take care of this part of the body.  This exercise is to activate your heart and let you feel love and expansion while balancing hormones and detoxing the body.

• activity.  Stand or sit naked in front of a mirror with some oil or nice body butter beside you.  Set your timer for 1 minute and begin glancing over your body just as the previous day.  Witnessing everything and offering yourself love and compassion.  It is okay to have resistance, the important thing is to notice the resistance and where it is targeted.  Once your timer goes off, take your oil or body butter and rub it into the palms of your hands with the intention of touching your body with loving hands.  Place your hands palm down on either side of your heart and breathe in 5 deep breaths exhaling "ahhhhhhh" out loud.   Breast massage helps to clear toxins, balance hormones, activate the heart chakra and keep breasts full , lifted and healthy.   Avoid the nipple and aeriola, this is focused on the muscle and fat of the breast from the armpit to just below the crease of the breasts.  Begin at the top exterior of the breast (almost at the armpit) with the palm of the hand (one on each breast)  and massage in small circles in an outward motion slowly 20 times, repeat in reverse 20 times.  Move your palms down to the outside of the breast area and repeat outward and inward circles 20 times.  Create a figure 8 going around and across each breast with your hands with light pressure 8-10 times.  Use your four finger to gently knead the breast tissue.  Repeat figure 8 steps and then rest your hands flat on your chest and breathe for 2 minutes.  Bring your hands down to your belly and do 8 circles to the right and 8 circles to the left covering the entire belly.  Rest with your hands on your belly.  Feel the opening of the heart and the movement of energy.   I have included two charts that demonstrate slightly different breast massage techniques.  

3.  Refamiliarizing yourself with your body and increasing circulation.  Who doesn't enjoy having their body rubbed with oils?  Receiving a massage is something I love and one day realized I never give myself them so this is an invitation to you to start a self-massage practice.   Every day after I shower I lather myself in oils and feel the beauty of my body, even the squishier parts I use to hide and hate.  Now I love when I grab my thighs and belly, it feels so good to release the tension they hold. 

• activity:  after your shower and your body is warm and open take your favourite body butter, coconut oil  or avocado oil and take your time massaging it into every inch of your body.  Taking care of your skin with healthy and organic products feels so good for the soul and our inner Feminine is so in tune with nature that using products of Earth gives us a sense of connection and power over our own health, even in such a small action.   Skin is our largest organ and receives everything it touches so please ensure that you are using natural solutions if it is within your means - grab whatever oil you've got and use it - research some housemade body oils - let yourself get creative and make your own oil rubs, it is so easy and makes the experience so much nicer - taking care of your body will leave you feeling more full.     Massaging your body after you shower helps to release muscle tension and detox the adrenals.    Steam opens everything up and allows penetration at a deeper level.    Lock your door and enjoy your self-massage.

4.  Dance in the darkness.  The Feminine has the ability to walk into the darkness with authority and confidence in each of her steps she is also fiercely her authentic self and lets no one stop her from being a weirdo.   This is your opportunity to dance like no one is watching. 

• activity:  either inside or out ensure it is dark and light a few candles in safe areas.     Choose a song that lets your feel the slowness in your movements, a slow song that gets your juices flowing.     Youtube if your bestfriend if you have access and you can google goddess  mantra songs or activating my goddess and you should get some options if you feel stuck.   It may be a 90s R&B song.    Whatever lets you drop into your hips and feel the movements in your spine.  If you want to put on a faster jam after and dance around or twerk please do so.  Please start with the slow song and see how you move intuitively, drop the ego and just move.  Roll on the floor, bend your knees, stick your chest and butt out, make figure 8s with your hips, whatever you want, dance like no one is watching.  

5.  Reconnecting to your womb/sacral chakra/pelvis.  Dearmouring with exterior womb massage.    Everyone holds tension, memories, shame and worthiness in their sacral chakra.  Using massage helps connect us to a part of the body that is often neglected unless sex is involved and helps to breakdown shame programs and works with forgiveness and releasing if painful memories.  Go slow with this and do not hold back what comes forward.  The first time I gave myself a womb massage I cried my eyes out, the next time I was smiling and happy.  It is an experience and one that provides self-healing.

• activity: make this as done up or as simple as you would like.  You can set the mood and  and make an altar or you can lie down on the floor or bed  as it is already.   If you want to dress it up and let yourself have a beautiful space do so.   I recommend either not wearing pants or wearing loose waisted pants that do not restrict you.  Lie down and take your massage oil/butter and rub it into your hands, set the intention that your hands are infusing your body with love and light and place them palms down resting on your hips/pelvis/womb.    After taking 8 deep breaths, inhale into the nose and exhale through the mouth saying "ahhhhhhh" you may begin.    Beginning with very gentle pressure  create circles rotating in an outward direction   with both hands for as long as you need and then reverse.   Allow the circles to naturally increase in size and pressure.    This should be around 5 minutes.   Then take your fingertips and making smaller circles  tracing the centre of the pelvis, about 3 minutes.  Now use your entire hand and make wavelike motions  moving across the pelvis area.   Let your intuition guide you.   If parts feel painful spend some more time there and go slow and easy.  This is a highly sensitive area of the body.   Use different parts of the hand and continue on your womb massage.    The process should be 20-30 minutes.  Once you have completed the massage lie in stillness and silence for a few minutes breathing and maybe even moving the legs or spine to release energy.    Journal about your experience and then sit outside to ground.  Ensure you drink lots of water as water is the element of the sacral chakra and will help clear and replenish the energy.

6.  Dress like you own it.   Clothing can be a beautiful tool of expression and it doesn't need to be glamarous.   I know I didn't wear dresses or skirts or low cut tops because I didn't want the attention before.    Now I wear what I want when I want and don't care if someone is staring.  I have strong boundaries and have no problem holding them with others when it comes to my body.    Being sexualized so young took a toll on my self-expression when it came to looking pretty/sexy/glamarous.    Now I feed my inner Feminine by dressing up when she feels like it.

• activity: journal first and then dress.  What does sexy mean to you? What does femininity mean to you? What would you wear if you truly didn't care what others thought?  makeup no makeup? jewellery no jewellery?  Get into how she shows up.  Now dress like a boss! Casual is sexy.  Maybe it isn't sexy you're going for, maybe it is comfort that she wants today, do that.    Dress like you want and wear it with confidence.

7.  Salt Clearing: ritual bath/footsoak/bodyscrub.  Choose your adventure depending on what you have access to.    If you have a bath that is my recommendation, if not, make a footsoak in a big mixing bowl or your sink, if that is not an option take some finley ground salt and coconut oil, mix them into a paste and this is your body scrub to cleanse.

• activity: set up a sacred space for yourself to enjoy this alone time and celebrate yourself. Give yourself the permission to turn the phone off, to light some candles, to make a delicious treat and to climb into a Goddess bath that is just for you.   Use high quality salts for your bath as your body absorbs what you soak in and allow the salt to do its thing.   Salt clears energy, it helps clear the lungs, break down scar tissue and protect your energy body as well.   Salt comes from Mama Earth so again you're activating that natural connection to the Feminine and supplying yourself with medicine.  Salt is my go to for most things.   If you want to put some fresh flowers in the bath with you  please do so.   Bonus if you wanna massage some delicious oils all over your body after your bath.   Play music, don't, meditate or don't,  but please take time to witness your beautiful body as you lie in the hot water healing your body.   If you do not have a tub sub in footsoak and do the same process.   You can detox a lot out of the souls of your feet and salt helps increase circulation.   You can vizualise all that you wish to leave exiting your body into the water.   Dispose of the water outside if you have used all natural products and thank yourself for honouring where you are at.   If you feel called to use the scrub, lube yourself up with that beautiful salt scrub and let sit on the skin for 10 minutes while the salt soaks up all the energetic sludge from your energy field and helps to pull the dead skin off the body.     Wash well in the shower but please be careful as oil makes the shower rather slick.     Let yourself have the time and space to enjoy whichever process you choose to use for your clearing ritual.    May your Goddess be with you from this day on.   It is always nice to journal after or during one of these clearings which I recommend doing once a week.   Witness what has shifted and what is changing.

Each of these steps guide you into taking action towards loving and embracing some of the pieces of us that have been shamed whether we see it or not.    It is an invitation to try something different and to take a different perspective on what it means to live in the Feminine.    It is not an outward expression but rather an inward experience of self love and devotion.

I hope you found this helpful on your journey to discovering your juicy self and that you will join the 7 day challenge beginning  Monday, September 14 where you will receive daily email updates to support you on your journey.   Join other women and seduce the inner Feminine.